stiff upper lip

A clock with a broken tick on the wall constantly watches over my inability to construct a future. Getting through each days fog is like being in a cage with no key. To escape without a mauling I must learn to understand the beast creeping up within me. Isolation and loneliness bring a smile with a stiff upper lip because islands never cry. The weathering will break me down, but to a rock without pain.

Women are like paintings...you can't enjoy them if you try to understand them.

Freddy Mercury

in this world

...you are the only exception

Brisbane females

I laugh because you say you're different, I shake my head because you're all the same

Isolation

But if you could just see the beauty,
These things I could never describe,
These pleasures a wayward distraction,
This is my one lucky prize.

when it's cold

I don't want to swim the ocean
I don't want to fight the tide
I don't want to swim forever
When it's cold I'd like to die

clove smoke catharsis

If only pure sweetness was offered, why's this bitter taste still in my mouth?

If I could catch my breath just to exhale, I know that I held it for too long.

miss you

She leaves me voicemails so I can listen to her husky voice x

cunt

Love is no longer a cunt I want to penetrate

crazy

“Some people never go crazy, What truly horrible lives they must live”
- Charles Bukowski

frozen

Hearts frozen solid, thawed once more by the spring of rage, despair and hopelessness

why?

We ignore those who adore us, we adore those who ignore us

hurt those who love us, and love those who hurt us.

you are not the sun

A soul is always torn when loved and then abused
tomorrow never came, tonights were just a cue
a sweater once so warm, then worn and washed for fun
it’s cold today and you are not the sun


A mind once my light and a heart forever pure
but a fool i was to think a dose of her could be my cure
It's dark out there, regrets have just begun
yeah I'm still cold and you are not the sun.

decision

Are you the one hanging on the cross or the one banging in the nails?

weiland wank yet again

sorry

you are not the sun

a girl named desire

She was the choice of a noble man but she fooled him
Her mind burned down bridges but her soul couldn’t swim
With a heart of the weak she fought bombs with fire
And when the big guns came out she was the girl named desire

She was a frontline assault, ignorance her attack
Armed with weakness and a knife for their backs
Trapped by four walls in a world of disguise
As she lied through her heart they saw truth in her eyes

he said “why why why can’t this house be at mend?”
well if betrayal was a bandage son we’d all be friends

a house that’s divided is a house that can’t stand
when tension’s so easy with a boy amongst men
with a mind of the weak, a coward under fire
fight the hate blame the young and the girl named desire

decisions decisions decisions, where do we go from here

she was the girl named desire
she wasn’t true to herself
she was the girl named desire
she was in debt to herself

decisions decisions decisions, where do we go from here

she was the girl named desire

and a question

Do you intend to use your beautiful voice to praise the lord? Or to change the world?

at first sight

There was a time when silence meant nothing to me. The lack of sound was neither haunting nor beautiful. Winter came only once a year so I danced red cheeked at the sight of first snow, tongue out to taste each flakes welcome sting. I smiled distracted by natures cycle for a single moment as I floated gracefully in a torrent of sorrow I couldn’t grasp. I craved fulfilment, too shallow to know I could never be truly content again.

It's good to dream

x

Once for you alien girl x

We're so handsome

In the morning when we wake up, are our minds left craving substance?
Limbs are hidden in the linen wrapped in doubt, but they don’t let go
What’s the news today? Tomorrow’s far away

Though we’re so handsome, it’s our minds that fight us off
Never listen, to our minds they’ll fight us off

Scream, Aim, Fire, it’s our minds that fight us off

Like a pebble to a still pond the ripples last forever
Isolation, strange reflections, heavy smiles in the great unknown
Are we far away?
A love without the grace

Though we’re so handsome, it’s our minds that fight us off
Never listen, to our minds they’ll fight us off

Scream, Aim, Fire, it’s our minds that fight us off

Pumping nerves through our system
Nothing good last forever
We are substance
They’ll never see what we built, They’ll never see what we built

Scream, Aim, Fire, it’s our minds that fight us off

We are so handsome

"Joy Division you cunt"

closure

I finally hate you. It feels good x

ok I may question god but this bullshit?

shadowplay

To the centre of the city where all roads meet, waiting for you.
To the depths of the ocean where all hopes sank, searching for you.
I was moving through the silence without motion, waiting for you.
In a room with a window in the corner I found truth.

control

So this is permanence, love shattered pride.
What once was innocence has turned on its side.

save a prayer

Some call it a one night stand, but we can call it paradise.

she's coming home

time to wake up

Wearing ripped jeans and doc martins does not make you a punk fucking rocker!!! Take your high end fashion back to the corporate scum it came from and cheaper countries it was made in along with the so called amazing stick thin long haired cliche models trying to dress grungey and "different". This city's already gone to the dogs, we don't need every kid thinking a once ethical movement is "cool" again.

Quit your band, support the scene. Put down your cameras and raise your middle finger!

Wake up you fad hungry new age mannequins!

weiland man love

two thousand and nine

Love, hate, hope, falling, heartbreak, bitterness, anger, voice, reason, faith, sadness, death, beauty, smiles, isolation.




It was a big year and one I'll remember for many to come. A year mainly spent on my own without most of my music and art to get me through, a year of planning for the future, the year I actually fell in love, the year I finally managed to shed a tear, the year I stuck strong to my true friends and family, the year I stood back in the shadows and witnessed alot of bullshit around me. The year I realised by the end of it that everything was in its right place.

As I enter the new year smiling still with heaviness in my heart I smile as I look around and witness the beautiful things in life like becoming a godfather and seeing my best mate step up to the father role. My best friend moving back home to help me take one last big shot with my music. A band happy enough to let me rock out and gig with again. New direction with my business plans, photography and modelling and locked in adventures around the world.

This year is not only the start but a second chance at taking on and changing the world so readers, lurkers, stalkers, admirers, lovers, haters and believers...you've been warned!

x

A big thankyou to those around me for the support and beauty last year.

To my new roomies, Lisa and the shingle crew thanks for all the laughs drunken times and many more to come.

To Kimbo thankyou for the smokes and wise chats. You're a gem!

To Sash and Dj Lars and now little noah thankyou for the ongoing gc connection love, booze and the best of times.

To miss Shauna Jane aka little nicks thankyou so much for your friendship and loyalty and for being a true rat. Angry young and poor forever! You'll be amazing bassist! You helped me get through alot last year without even knowing.love you x

To my brother from another mother and rocknroll stadium rocker Col the visits last year just reminded us of how fun rum cocktails and world domination can be. Here's to killing it this year! Thanks for everything. love ya

To Mick and my townsville crew, Blake, Dylan and now of course Chels and little Jacob you guys are all like my family and have been since we were silly punk kids haha. For all the support, beds and couches borrowed, late night drunken antics and general hooliganism as well as true friendship a huge fucking thankyou!

Last but not least one person who I will always remember who came into my world last year...Mel. All that has been said has been said so just know that I appreciated and adored every second we had. You restored my faith in human beings and showed me true beauty. There are too many things to thank you for as you know but just know I'm smiling and wishing you all the best with lifes adventures. You will change the world, goodluck in Africa. I know all is in it's right place with us, yourself and your world. See you again someday.You are truely fucking beautiful xo

Thankyou 2009, lookout 2010!!!

papillon

I have a special date with the editors and mercy dolls tonight x

today

You don't know love like you use to
Now I don't know god like I use to
These perfect crimes I do so well, i'm selling souls so I can sell
Is there a special place in hell for me?

actions

When we aren't children anymore we are already dead. Theories are patterns without value. Only actions count.

late night chats

Dont make someone a priority when they only make you an option.

leave me alone

I wrote a nasty letter and I sent it to the lord. I said don't you dare come and bother me anymore.

You fucking fashion fad hipsters!!!!

HAVE YOU EVER LISTENED AND TRUELY ENJOYED NIRVANA!

Kurt wasn't a fashion/sex symbol he was the voice of an angry fed up generation. Scream like you mean, not wear it like you see it. Blast your stereos with youthful rage, not blog a frontman you're barely interested or inspired by. Write from you're raging minds and hearts instead of captioning 'artistic' irrelevant photos that make no sence.

It's 2010 so fucking wake up to yourselves! We are the next revolution so make it count!

I had a pony...

...her name was lucifer

You laugh because I'm different...

...I laugh because you're all the same

marry me

Ani hu sheshokhen betokh

אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.אני הוא ששוכן בתוך קין.

face to fucking face

You say the truth will set us free...then set us free because my fingers are blistering from holding onto that final raggered string. x

1.2.3.4.5.6.

I am the one who dwells within
You think you can force me out?
I dare you...

New wave mannequins

Magazines form overseas, won't teach you how to feel
They trade in their hearts for indie rock charts to tell them what is real
The truth about conformity, is it bites without a sting
Trends come and go, but when your alone it doesn't mean a thing

soo Brian...

...It's time to let go now

dead and bloated

I am smelling like the rose that somebody gave me on my birthday deathbed
I am smelling like the rose that somebody gave me because I'm dead & bloated

Darling just don't put down your guns yet

If there really was a god here, he'd have raised a hand by now.

realise

The man inside the moon is watching you lie to me.

True freedom

"You think you're free? I'm free! You don't know what freedom is! I'm free. I can breathe. And you... will choke on your average fuckin' mediocre life! "

...Hollywood loses another young star

december sixteen two thousand and nine

That night was one of the most amazing and inspiring nights of my life. I finally witnessed the remarkable songwriting of fleetwood mac and the poetry of stevie nicks. Playing an amazing and highly entertaining set of all their classics while trying to out do each other musically just shook me emotionally and mentally to witness 4 people who have been through a lifetime of ups and downs to be still strutting their stuff in front of my very eyes.

To share it alongside my favourite little lady singing every word with me and going through every leap and bound of their emotional rollercoaster ride of songs meant alot, with my best mate drunk and entertaining amongst the crowd as well haha. Thankyou for a special night Mick, John, Lindsay and Stevie, you left us breathless for many hours after (even so I couldn't party yet drive around blaring youtube vids and singing our arses off).

It was nice to wake up the next morning with the biggest smile on my face.

x



"Oh mirror in the sky
What is love
Can the child within my heart rise above
Can I sail thru the changing ocean tides
Can I handle the seasons of my life"

off and racing in the emotional stakes

Now coming around the final stretch here comes the chasers, my mind, my body, my soul but my heart stays in the lead.

landslide

I've been afraid of changing because I built my life around you

- stevie nicks x

weakness

You're just like all the rest and that's what sucks the most.

you

I love the way I see you
Even though your not in the room.

I love your passion
Even if its out of tune.

I love the way you listened
To everything I've said.

I love the way your alive
Even though your dead.

-ian curtis

Tomorrow!

My brother from another mother comes home and I witness fleetwood mac performing in front of my very eyes finally.Tomorrow will be a great day!

knocked out

Ahh the beautiful people you meet in hospital. It's ironic how the most ill or injured are also so nice

i think we have an emergency

I've seen love die way to many times when it deserves to be alive x

I dread the night

I want to be anyone in the world but me, trapped in the body of a man defeated, I am ashamed of mistakes repeated.

summer reign

I hate this time of the year. The ever reminder of loneliness wrapped in the pressure of trying to be festive. Thought you'd be around.

miss you x

knock knock

"I never felt open in any way. I would never impulsively ring people and assume that they’d want to see me, or just go ‘round. I always had to sit down and think very hard before I knocked on anybody’s door. And consequently, I never really knocked." - Morrissey.

irony in closure

"All i ever was to you, was a hand to hold and fun. All you ever were to me was the world. Closure never felt so right."

made me smile

Will you keep out all the sadness?

Happiness isn't always the best way to be happy.

I hope you're listening

God show me the way because the Devil's trying to break me down.

The only thing that I pray is that my feet don't fail me now.

I don't think there is nothing I can do now to right my wrongs.

I want to talk to God but I'm afraid because we havn't spoke in so long.

The writer of our movie

It's like we've been reading this script, who's the director of this movie? He's doing a good job. It's like all the pieces could fit if only we turned them all around to see us, to see us?

Let me paint a scene for you nothing more nothing less than my favouritre dreams come true
It can't be real what we feel its like it's all been written.
The camera sitting in our eyes and this is how I see it. x

i let go

Sorry but you're just too beautiful and my chest can no longer take the pounding x

matters of the heart, mind and soul

The search for a god is meaningless if everyone dies alone,
What happened to intelligence is this over pregnant world?

I should know better but I'll always hate, make life a struggle, I'm better this way
If I live fast, but die young and insane, would I live forever an idol, a saint?

Does it feel better knowing forever was the devil himself lurking in disguise
His heartfelt confession did he ever mention was an ace up his sleeve of lies

Love is a struggle, faith will sedate, god is a vampire and I am the stake
Like longing for sweetness in a sour taste, you can't play the rebel in act of grace.

in light of death

(Something written quite some time ago)

Fucked up beyond repair I've got a web of memories
Tangled and easy to tear, torn and broken
Head up look to the sky, the moonlight glowing
The stars shine from your eyes, I know I'll see you on the otherside

baaaah fucking baaaah

People like you will never understand that the true price of beauty is in the untimely balance of our hearts.I don't blame you for not understanding instead almost empathise.

heaven as we know it

Fuck the new romantics, it's only rockn'roll.
This is our religion for heaven we'll never know!

x